But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
