After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
