Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
