Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
