Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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