She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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