That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
