I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
