Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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