ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
