all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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