Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
