so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Randomize
