i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
