How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize