that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I am available for nakedness
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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