I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
