And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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