So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
