i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
