It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Dick very happy bro
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