the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
