Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(970): View more from Colorado

Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me

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(309): View more from Illinois

My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass

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(785): View more from Kansas

whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick

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(518): View more from New York

he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."

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(678): View more from Georgia

Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.

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(253): View more from Washington

Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.

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(540): View more from Virginia

He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.

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(716): View more from New York

Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.

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(936): View more from Texas

Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.

(936): View more from Texas

Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!

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