Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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