Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Randomize
