I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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