I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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