everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
