just come out here and I will go home with you...
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
