does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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