I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
