you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
