Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
