Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
