ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
