Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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