my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize