I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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