I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
