last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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