ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
