Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
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