Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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