Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
