I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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