I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
