yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
he puts the penis in happiness.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I said "one day" and that day is not today
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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