And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
