She said her name was "party"
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
