Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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